It feels like months since I last sat down in front of my computer with the express purpose of working out exactly how much money I’ve thrown at my toy car over the recent past. It feels like months, because it has been months. As you may have read, the summer was a particularly bad time for relations with my Elise. Not only did it cost me a four figure sum the week before I went on holiday but it’s not the most comfortable car to be stuck inside whilst sitting in a traffic jam on the M1 in 30°C heat. As I write this, the picture couldn’t be more different. The Lotus is sat outside, tucked up under its shower cap, covered in a blanket of snow. It hasn’t moved in over a week and for that I feel truly guilty. The mileage has tailed off somewhat since the head gasket episode. Not intentionally, but having returned to work after my summer sabbatical I find myself choosing my comfortable daily driver for the slog to the office instead of the Elise. The current weather conditions haven’t helped matters: the Elise isn’t much fun to drive in wet/icy conditions unless you have a lot more talent than I do. Now that I’ve repented for my neglect of the car over recent weeks we can progress to the fiscal parts of these articles that prospective owners (hopefully) find useful and cause the writers such distress...

It hasn’t been a cheap few months but at least the damage to my bank account has been done by necessities rather than mechanical repairs. Insurance has to come first as it’s the largest figure in the ‘debit’ column. Amazingly it sneaks in under £1,000 this year. OK, only by £50 but I’m happy with that. A recommendation to a broker from an internet buddy saved me a lot of time and money during the renewal process and they proved a great deal more pleasant to deal with than the ‘high street’ names I’ve insured cars with in the past. Second place on the expense list goes to tyres. Just before Christmas I noticed I had some extra leave to use at work. Whilst wondering what to do with my new-found freedom I noticed some small cracks appearing in the tread on both front tyres. So I took a day off and spent just over £230, after fitting and balancing a pair of Yokohama Advans which are designed specifically for use on the Elise.

While waiting for my tyres to be fitted, I had the opportunity to take another Elise for a short spin up the local dual carriageway. This Elise was fitted with one of the increasingly popular Honda ‘K20’ (see: Civic Type R) engine conversions. I’m unsure as to the amount of power the car in question was putting out when I drove it, all I can tell you is that it felt a good sight quicker than anything I have ever driven or ridden in. Perhaps the perception of speed is amplified by one’s proximity to the ground, perhaps by the noise in the cabin, or perhaps they really are just as fast as the owners of them will have the rest of us believe!

I’m not normally a fan of VTEC, I drove a S2000 and hated it, but it seemed to suit the Elise quite well. Pottering around below VTEC (which had been remapped to kick in at lower revs than in a Civic Type R) the car was incredibly civilised and I’d struggle to tell the difference over my K-Series car. Get it in to the VTEC zone though and it becomes a total animal. Brutal, is the best word to describe it.

If you read one of my auto-journals in twelve months time, and I still own the Lotus, you’re likely to be reading a piece describing how I’ve spent £8000 on an engine conversion and how my girlfriend’s left me. I can’t wait to try an Elise with the VAG 1.8 turbo...

Back to my own car. In the summer, my driver’s window did the usual S1 Elise trick of falling off its runners and vanishing in to the door (the felt channels the window runs in tend to lose their slip over time and collapse upon themselves, causing the window to jam and then pop off the retaining clips). As it was warm and dry at the time, I fixed it myself. All was well for a month or two until the window once more performed its vanishing act. I propped it back in the ‘up’ position and forgot about it, as the conditions were now somewhat less conducive to spending a couple of hours swearing at my car in the road. I finally decided to have a professional take care of it and took the car to Lotus specialist Steve Williams. Not only did he squeeze me in at short notice but only charged me a couple of hours labour to put it right. Another £90 in the ‘debit’ column for that one.

I took part in a world record attempt in January. On the 28th January 2007, 313 Lotuses of assorted models descended on Brands Hatch in an attempt to break the world record for the largest procession of a single make of car, on a race track. With such nicely constrained record criteria it ought to be a doddle, we all thought. It proved quite tricky to actually keep 311 (two broke down) cars moving around the Indy circuit as a single entity. Clutches started to smell and several engines overheated but we were given the record, beating that held by a Mazda club. There is plenty more information on the day to be found on PistonHeads.com if you so desire.

Shamefully that is still my only experience on a track but I’ll get it on to a track properly at some point, honest.

Many thanks to Andrew Colebrook for the Brands Hatch photo and Tom Platt for the Touareg picture.